a teal painted room

Yes. I am still alive and breathing. Breathing and smiling.

I haven't forgotten about blogging. I actually have tried starting a new post but I never know how to write what I want to say. To be honest, whenever I work a midnight or have at least five minutes to sit and relax blogging comes to mind.

I think I have started about 27 different blogs since the beginning of this summer and I have not completed one of them. Each one starts out somewhat the same and then they all take drastic turns. The subjects vary from working-to my summer so far-to defining myself-to waiting for life to happen-to questions about my being-to questions about the way in which I think-to my love of my friends from home-to singing RENT songs in his car-to relearning who I am and who I want to grow into.

That said, I honestly do not know where this blog is going to end up. It is hard describing my summer to those who have never been to my home town or met my best friend(s).

Therefore, this will be a hometown-neutral blog.

Happiness has found its way back. Or, I have found my way to happiness? I am sitting on my bed, half in pj's and half in the outfit I wore to work today, teeth brushed, make-up still on, mosquito bites all over my legs and ankles and completely content. Content is actually the wrong word. Utterly excited and enthused about life.
I am working on building a canvas for my painting. Yes, I could go to Wal-Mart and buy 3 white boards for 2 dollars or I could spend a bit more time cutting and nailing the wood together and stretching the sheet over the newly built frame. I think I will go with the latter.
Nothing is holding me back. I can go anywhere and do anything I want. (Yes, money may be a factor but I am working (pun) on that). Whenever I drive to or from work, the independent woman role takes over me. (take from that what you will) :)

I guess my struggle with knowing what exactly to type within this "new post" is merely the awe I have.
Eh, here's to best friends, talks over a bonfire, road trips up the north shore, working/caring for people who have worked their way into your heart, getting napkin notes on your car at work, sister days, hugs goodnight knowing you will see them tomorrow, needed conversations, independence, confidence, love, life, parents, and you.

PS-Making muffins and playing Scrabble are perfect things to do on a late date night.

Love you all,
(Will write frequently)
Renae